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Good idea: Doing a S&M photo shoot. Bad idea, scheduling a OB/GYN appointment for the following day. Your doctor will see the massive bruises, she will not believe you do it for pleasure , you will have to sit threw a 30 minute talk about therapists and shelters in your area.
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*through
So let me get this straight…you obviously made it clear to her that you DO in fact to S&M for pleasure, and even AFTER you told her this, she REFUSED to believe you, and forced you to sit through a lecture on abuse, therapists, and shelters? Wow, pushy much?
Given that you ALREADY explained the bruises and she just would not listen, she acted very unprofessionally. She should’ve just left it at that.
I’m sure she’s NOT the first gyno to encounter S&M marks, but the way she handled it…I doubt that many gynos would’ve gone this far.
I hope you reported her. I would have.
Anyone who is so messed up that they think pain is pleasure needs a therapist. Yes, I am making a judgement call. No I don’t care that you’re so screwed up you think I’m a prude. Abuse is abuse, and just because the abused is so used to it they can’t see it is abuse anymore doesn’t mean it’s right or should be tolerated.
Sometimes neurons get crossed. There’s nothing wrong with it as long as you aren’t doing permanent damage to yourself or hurting anyone else without very explicit consent. One of the first rules of BDSM is “be safe”.
But the issue is the “massive bruises.” When something leaves massive bruises on you but you claim to find pleasure in it, then there is a mental health issue.
Disagree. That isn’t what “mental health” means.
Bruises won’t harm you if they’re skin-deep. You’re probably thinking of deliberate self-harm, where people do serious damage to themselves e.g. through cuts that might get infected, because of a compulsion to punish themselves or release deep emotional bottle-ups.
Pain for pleasure is perfectly healthy. Not my scene, but as someone who has worked in mental healthcare for 11 years, I wouldn’t see the tendency per se as relevant to a person’s health – unless its pattern was abnormal, e.g. they were using it to relive an abusive experience.
Tattoos, anyone?
Funny how dipsh!ts can get all judgemental about consensual S&M and yet not bat an eyelid at injuries caused by tattoos, piercings, boxing, rugby, football, etc.
They think they’re being rational and not at all prudish but, in reality, they are not.
Meh, I’m not into BDSM myself, but as long as it’s safe, sane, and consensual, what consenting adults do behind closed doors is none of my business. Some people are neurologically weird – that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are neurologically messed up and in need of a therapist.
So you’ve never had a really full-on deep massage? So you’ve never had full-on sex with someone “endowed” who stretched you to your limit, but it was still pleasurable? So you’ve never done any endurance sport?
If none of those things, your loss as to why you don’t know how pain can be experienced as pleasure or a challenge to surmount.
Wow none of those is really comparable to BDSM. Nothing wrong with it hey whatever floats your boat says I.
Actually they’re quite comparable; the rush I feel from being flogged or scratched feels pretty good in a similar way to distance running or weight training or even getting a caffeine buzz *if* you decontextualize it. In the end, they’re all mighty good endorphins.
There’s an added element to doing S&M with someone you know though. The thrill of giving knowing glances to one another as you feel your raw flesh shift beneath your clothing as a constant reminder of your escapades…
Oi, I’m going to start turning myself on if I’m not careful.
and akward creepy post of the day goes to….
and the misspelling post of the day goes to…waggle237! The word is “awkward” and the bonus round would like you to know there should have been a comma between awkward & creepy.
oh cool! you learned to spot typos and grammar mistakes on the internet! is there anything you cant do?
Yeah none of those really compares to being whipped at all. I’m going to have to agree with Waggle here you are just plain creepy.
And yet people routinely enjoy events where they shoot high-powered projectiles at each other while wearing minimal safety gear, an activity guaranteed to inflict pain and often leave deep bruises… paintball, anyone? Plus I’m sure most people get a thrill out of watching shows like MXC where they glorify contestants getting hit, slammed, shot at, bowled over, half-drowned and sent flying from impacts. Everyone’s into pain in one way or another, some of us are just more open-minded about it.
Wow comparing all of those to BDSM is kind of bizarre. Note I have no problem with any kind of kink provided it is between consenting adults. You really do yourself a disservice continually trying to prove that everyone is into BDSM at one level or another when it obviously isn’t the case. It makes you look insecure and childish. I recommend you just accept yourself and stop making yourself and those who are into BDSM look bad by doing this.
Good job being brave enough to speak your mind! I’m assuming ‘alan’ is male, you should know, I don’t think its perverse when males enjoy pain, I find it reassuring, and endearing :3 You’ll find a girl who knows how to crack your whip, so enjoy and God bless!
You’ve gone ahead and made my day, sir.
are you really comparing exercise to purposefully torturing yourself or someone else to the point of significant marks and bruises? man, you really are messed up
No, you’re the one who is both messed up and ignorant. (And a little bit stupid, too). Trust me on this.
exercise is purposefully torturing yourself by definition
“runner’s high” is definitely something messed up
Have done endurance sports, martial arts (including sparring), and worked construction for years putting myself through school. I know exactly what you mean…
… however – while an endorphine/adrenaline rush is one thing, doing damage to oneself to the point of large bruises is BAD and unhealthy. Again – the poster said ‘massive bruises’, so I am taking her at her word that we are not talking ‘in the line of work/play/sports’ bruises but ones large and deep enough to have a physican concerned. Brusing to that level is DANGEROUS – it is tissue damage and the resulting blood clots and can (and does) lead to troke and heart attacks as well as long term disability from nerve/tissue damage in the affected area.
Regardless of the poster’s opinion, the doctor was correct – in their professional opinion, the indvidual needed help and they attempted to get it for her. And if the poster was truthful, she DOES need help if she is doing that level of damage to her body.
So you’ve never got bruises like that playing sport?
I’ve had far worse injuries that that from playing football. Does that mean it’s bad and unhealthy to play football? I know it’s different when injuries aren’t caused DELIBERATELY, but the risks are far, far higher.
With the head injuries(concussions) football is way worse to ones health.
Exactly, although broken legs/torn ligaments etc are far more common (when I say football, I mean what Americans call soccer – but I absolutely refuse to use that word to describe it
)
Nope – if someone asks for and enjoys it, it is NOT “abuse.” I don’t think that word means what you think it means. Look it up.
I do see where you’re coming from, I think. But you’re getting confused between people who’ve been abused so much that they think pain is normal, and people who seek pain because it’s “wrong” and therefore thrilling. The latter applies to a lot of perfectly normal people. I’ve had a lot of partners who like to be slapped or bitten during sex. Also, experiencing pain releases endorphins that can be very arousing.
You know I’m pretty sure none of your cats really wanted to be slapped although I’ve heard the biting is normal.
??? I don’t have any cats.
Oh it’s you, you old bastard. LOL, sorry Skittles, I didn’t notice who I was replying to. As it’s you, yes, I regularly tie my fifteen cats to my bedposts with studded leather straps and make them whip me with their tails.
prude
Ever gotten a hickey and enjoyed it? Well, it’s a bruise so you’re going to need therapy according to your logic.
^THIS
Is this site only popular in Spokane or something?
Everyone has their own personal kink, there is nothing wrong with that so long as both parties are consenting adults. If the dom knows what he/she is doing then no permanent harm is done, and frankly it is no one else’s business what other people do in the privacy of their own homes.
… It’s not abuse. The difference is intent and whether or not there was consent beforehand. Abusers rarely ask before abusing, and the intent there is to do harm/to punish. With BDSM, the partners agree to it beforehand, (usually) know each other’s comfort zones and/or have a safe word so the other knows when it’s going too far, and the intent is to give pleasure to the other, even if the means of doing so is pain. There is no intent to cause injury, and, in fact, injuring your partner is looked down on by the BDSM community.
All this from someone who has yet to try it, so look it up yourself, but still… There’s a very clear, very thick line between BDSM and abuse, and BDSM is fine so long as that line is not crossed.
Anyone who’s so messed up that they think a condition like Algolagnia requires a therapist, needs a therapist. Anyone who slams others for consensual practises of any nature between legal adults, needs to crawl back between the covers of the fairy tale they crawled out of. And anyone who thinks such things are even in the same category as actual abuse, needs to keep his opinions to himself. Abuse is non-consensual. Adventurous sex generally is. Grow a brain. Obviously you’ll never grow balls.
Some people do it to themselves, though. It’s not abuse if you consent.
She may have had a hard time articulating her preference for S&M. We don’t know if she identifies as a “sub” or a “slave” and if she identifies as a “slave”, she may have made a statement such as “It’s what my Master/Mistress wanted” at the time or other such descriptions that aren’t clear to those outside of the BDSM world. Ideally, we would hope the gyno is aware and respectful to the fetish community but when dealing with a patient that isn’t clear, sometimes a doctor can’t be certain if it’s a BDSM relationship or a female who feels her partner has a right to do what they please for the wrong reasons. You sound well articulated so if someone was to treat you in that “You need to seek out help” manner, it would appear to be because they lack knowledge or respect, but we don’t know much about how the submissive in question handles interactions in face to face questioning situations- especially with someone who can be viewed as someone “in power” such as a medical professional.
If she can’t articulate her desires and feeling well enough for that she probably shouldn’t do that kind of thing. Her partner in such activities needs to be aware and understand her limits and wants.
This time, I am on this side of the fence. Anyone whose awareness of the situation and what’s appropriate language to use in it is this poor would raise in me serious concerns over whether they were capable of consenting to it in the first place.
Not 100% sure about this. Many victims of domestic abuse have trouble talking about it and make up stories such as “I fell down the stairs”. It’s irrational that they protect their abuse, but that’s what happens in many cases. So a health provider should always probe a bit deeper beyond the first quick explanation.
This is true unfortunately. The ideal world is to find a health provider who you can explain to, IN ADVANCE, “sometimes there will be marks in odd places – this is the result of consensual BDSM”. Practitioners like that are awesome.
Second choice, if you KNOW you have doctor’s appointment, is not to do the hardcore shoot the day before? Seriously, duh?
Yeah – that’s why she posted it on LFMF, duh?
100% right.
The problem is abuse victims often make up stories to explain their injuries. The result is docs are very sensitive to injuries that aren’t of medical consequence.
The doc once asked my wife about a minor scratch and the doc was puzzled when I replied “apricot tree”. (We always end up with a scratch or two when the trees come ripe. I had responded because she didn’t understand what was being asked. {English is *NOT* her native language.})
um……what? maybe a therapist isnt such a bad idea after all…
@waggle, the fact that you would suggest therapy for S&M shows that you have a LOT of sexual hangups. No offense, but your post SCREAMS prude.
As long as it’s consentual on both parts, there is NOTHING “wrong with” or “abnormal” about this woman.
no, its completely normal to beat each other for “fun” and leave marks grusome enough that a doctor has serious concerns for your health, heck, i just did that last night!
Well, who doesn’t like a bit of spanking, or holding down, maybe nipping? BDSM is just a little further along in the creative scale. There is nothing wrong with it, no-one gets hurt more then they want (heck- one great way of punishing a masochistic submissive is to deny them play time.). Not everyone thinks missionary position is the only right position with doggy style to really spice it up.
Also- some people mark very easily- besides the marks aren’t to cause damage, just display. They just tend to look rather vibrant the next day.
Oh, i agree (not my thing but to each his own), but when a doctor is THAT insistant that you get some therapy after seeing the bruises, you might want to tone it down a pinch (HA! see what i did there? seriously though)
The reason they were insistent on therapy was because they didn’t believe it was consensual. As someone stated earlier, abused women often lie to cover up the abuse.
However, the fact that they said they enjoyed it would be my hint that it isn’t abuse, since most abused will make up a story that it was their own fault (since they usually believe the abuse is their fault in the first place). But since it was a gynecologist and not a psychologist, they probably wouldn’t know that, or at least know about it to that detail.
She mentioned a BDSM photoshoot, which tells me that what she does with BDSM is likely consensual.
Just because certain women lie about their abuse, does not mean that all of them do.
They gyno should’ve dropped it after the patient explained her bruises, but no, she had to go and overstep her bounds.
“No one gets hurt more than they want.” That’s all well and good, but some people WANT pain or injury that will cause permanent damage. I recall a show with a professional dominatrix who said she had a client ask her – in all seriousness- to cut off his scrotum with a pair of scissors. She told him she couldn’t do that as it would probably cause massive bleeding that couldn’t be stopped, so he settled for her shoving several needles into his scrotum instead. People don’t always know what’s good for them.
hey, whatever gets your rocks off
I see what you did there, and I approve. That was very funny.
Sick joke, dude… In both connotations. Rarely does one pull off such humor, but you, sir, have nailed it. Well played.
It does not seem to be a concern about health, but more about worries of non consentual abuse. Add in reporting policies of the hospital or medical group if not privately employed and the doctor might well have had no concerns for her health from her bruises, Just concerns for her relationship and long term health.
The concern was one of an abusive relationship not concerns directly over the state of her bruises. This is an important distinction.
Yeah,prudish isn’t bad.
Nor is a little play between informed and consenting adults. What are your kinks mm? Do they make you a bad person, do you just try to supress them, or do they make you unique and interesting?
I’m lucky enough that my partner is open minded and willing to accommodate my fetishes. It’s a shame that some other people are not open minded and equate mutually consensual sexual behaviours with “abuse” and believe that the participants require “therapy” as they are “messed up”. Different strokes for different folks. I would also suggest that these prudes don’t knock it until they’ve at least tried it.
i would try it, i just cant find any good nipple clamps to match my ball gag
I think it’s a bit different when you’re asking somebody to hurt you though. I personally lean towards bdsm but my partner doesn’t like to do it because he’s scared of hurting me, which is fair enough. It’s not being narrow-minded, it’s just that the idea of hurting somebody on purpose genuinely disturbs him, and it would be unfair of me to pressure him into it.
Prudish isn’t bad.
Attempting to enforce your own prudish standards on others is.
You are talking about a therapist to help you get over your delusion that it’s ok for you to have an opinion about what consenting adults do in a bedroom that isn’t yours right?
think, then type
CA’s post makes perfect sense to me…and your reply looks like someone losing an argument. Try again.
it was a horrible run on that changed directions too many times and seemed horribly unfocused. As far as an actual “argument”, if you want to go there, it is no longer done just inside her bedroom if she is taking pictures and posting about it on LFMF now is it?
Look, I know you get off on people trying to prove you wrong, but do you seriously think that mentioning BDSM qualifies as “doing it outside the bedroom” and is so offensive that any other such mentions should be squelched? Cut it out with the judgment already; it’s still not your business what consenting adults do together (obviously CreativeAnarchy’s point, which you conveniently ignored).
first off, i dont get off on people trying to prove me wrong, i’m sorry i dont just lie down and agree with everyone on certain topics. Also, im not saying you cant talk about it, but you cant exactly use the “just between two adults” excuse when you rush online to brag/complain about it. That would be like me saying “yo guys, i totally banged a chick last night and got the clap”, then when people say i should have worn protection me coming back with “hey, what i choose to do in the bedroom is private!” If you are going to throw it out on the internet, expect criticism
You’re right; my first comment was out of line and I apologize for that. Your analogy is invalid, however. Hopefully my point will be illustrated through paraphrasing the situations to be less specific:
this post:
“I did [consensual activity that I am NOT unhappy about] and had to deal with a health care worker’s ignorance/disbelief/etc. Lesson: plan better, don’t schedule these things next to each other. LFMF.”
you:
Judging OP’s consensual activities that they are presumably totally comfortable with.
Not okay because OP & partner(s)– again– are presumably perfectly happy with their own choices and it doesn’t affect you at all. No matter your own preferences (and I’ll be the first to say that whatever your consensual choices, they are all perfectly fine and not up for judging), it’s not your place to tell people that they should see a therapist just because you don’t enjoy the same activities as they do.
your example:
“I did [consensual activity that I AM now unhappy about]. Lesson: talk to partners about STIs/wear protection/get tested/etc. LFMF.”
hypothetical response:
“You should have worn protection.”
Not sure what else you’d expect people to say? It’s not like having STIs is something that people freely and happily choose out of enjoyment. That said, there are definitely a lot of potential really harmful comments that could be said in response to your hypothetical post (e.g. sex negativity etc, all the classic MM stuff), to which I’d likely tell those folks off as well, for the same reason: what consenting adults do together is nobody else’s business. Merely DISCUSSING it does not negate this.
Extreme hypothetical time: If you actually would be happy about contracting an STI, why would you consider it a fail to post on LFMF? If this hypothetical situation would be on some random forum elsewhere, and you indeed were happy about contracting an STI in a consensual way, then I suppose you’d have merit in asking people not to offer advice. However, I’m not going out on a limb here to suggest that this is a highly unlikely situation, which is why the situations are NOT analogous.
Psst… don’t feed the troll.
Tough call here. On one hand, yeah, maybe she should have taken you at your word. But if you were really being abused, you might have needed that push to get help. Best idea is to schedule more carefully!
And waggle, you’re totally off base.
pics or it didn’t happen
this might be the first time i am just fine with not seeing any pics, i will take her word for it
Why so far down in the comment thread?
Lol, sorry, didn’t realize I needed to post photographic proof. (this is my first LFMF post). I don’t have the shots from that shoot yet and the bruises are pretty faded at this point but I have another shoot this week and can post pics of that shoot’s aftermath if you like.
I think some of us would like that very much
what this guy said *>9000. and i do hope you too are laughing at the squeamish ignorant ones crying that its ‘abuse’ and ‘you need help’. but then, ive been the dom one for years in most my relationships, so im most likely biased.
Not a good idea actually…you want to do it in private,no one can stop you,but why do it and spreadics e erywhere?
^spread pics
Some people chose to “spread pics” because it is a part of their fetish, others do so with the intention of providing evidence to others that if they enjoy these activities, they are not alone in that preference. There is nothing to be hidden in an activity you are comfortable enjoying.
Others do it because models get paid.
I do not think that those doing it mainly for the money would be bruised very often. As no one wants to start a shoot with a bruised model it limits their work opportunities until they heal. This is why studios that use porn stars will frequently not mark their models regardless of the inclinations of those involved.
As for the photos, we have no evidence that they were spread around. It could be a personal photo album to remember their activities, or they could enjoy the thought of others viewing them as sexually attractive and want to spread them around. It could be paid, but that does not seem to be the main intent from the way the post was written.
They might not be spreading them: perhaps it’s for her own (and her partner’s) private enjoyment.
because as messed up as these people are, there are even more messed up people who want to see abuse happening
If it’s safe, sane, and consensual no abuse is taking place. Is that hard to understand?
ok..reading many of your posts here, i still cant tell if youre trolling or just stupid. if the former, try harder, much much harder, little boy. if the latter (which is equally likely, youngin), then i give to you this fun fact – countless numbers of people participate in both activities, most for free, and most you will never be able to spot on the street. they are your neighbor, your gas station attendant, your coworker, the president of your company, your parents, your waiter, your bus driver, your teacher and hell, one day when you grow old enough, your kids. the only time it is wrong, is when any one person involved is truly against it. worded that way, as sometimes, they like to pretend to be against it. long as EVERYONE involved consensual ahead of time, and works out safety/no go zones, there is nothing wrong with it.
why is it that whenever someone disagrees with the majority they are automatically trolling? ill never get it
and besides, i know there are deviants out there (BDMS, furries, etc) doesnt mean i cant find them strange and weird
Waggle’s a legendary troll. Sometimes, he states his true mind, but good luck figuring out when most of the time.
So are we voting that waggle237 is a troll, stupid or both? THAT’S the debate I’m enjoying here. (Bonus regarding the fact that waggle237 spends enough time here to answer just about every post that doesn’t agree on the INTERNET)
glad to see you back RC! do your cats know you are using the computer? you know they dont like you acting without their permission
Well, several reasons:
1. People get paid for it.
2. People are nice to forever alones who want to fap to this.
3. People like to get jobs that are enjoyable, pay well, and upset conservative old people like you. Pornstar is all three.
See this is why I don’t think you are the real MM. He would have said something about sex being wrong in the first place, and to add s&m to it is an abomination and then the picture part. If you are the real Mm why id you change the capitalization in your name and your picture?
* THROUGH
As for the S&M part… I dunno. Privacy is a good idea.
S&M photo shots are the best. But it sounds like it is time for a new doctor. A more accepting and aware one. You could search for one in the CAP database. Check out NCSFreedom.org. I found my doctor there and she knows that i am into bdsm so she never questions my marks. Good luck
^THIS
I agree with this. The gyno she is currently seeing went too far. She asked questions, and, when told the truth, it did not matter to her, no. She had to go and recommend a women’s shelter and therapy.
I think OP should take littlegirl’s advice and get a new doctor.
yeah… i think what you do in your own time is your own business.
but the OP is an ADULT right? so they can’t be forced to go to therapy. I would outright refuse and drop the doctor.
it’s one thing to suggest out of concern, it’s another to force it upon you.
*KAP not CAP
I’ve also noticed a tendency for members of the medical profession to believe what they want to, not what the patient says. Had one nurse adjust the amount of alcohol I reported, because “everyone lies about that”. I took the paperwork out of her hand, tore it in half and went to the front desk and cancelled my appointment. Changed doctors. Changed clinics. I will not tolerate being called a liar.
What the? If I had a doctor assume I was lying because a 20-something told them she didn’t drink, I would throw a fit. I don’t drink – ever. Because migraines suck.
that was a completely justified response, a little tipsy at the time were we?
Good for you. I cannot believe the audacity of some doctors. How rude of her.
@waggle, I’d have done the same thing. David wasn’t a “little tipsy” as you say, he was pissed off at the incompetent nurse.
Smarter idea – delaying said appointment till bruises go.
Nothing wrong with bdsm when consensual.
^THis.
Oddly enough, this is precisely what OP said they should have done, in hindsight.
Personally I`m not into the S&M scene, holds no appeal for me because of my own worldview (In other words, I`m all for violence in it`s place. I just don`t think that place is in my romantic life). But I had a good friend in the scene who explained it to me like this. “If you beat your wife because you think she deserves it, you`re a sick bastard. If you beat your wife because she enjoys it, asks you to, and it brings you closer together, then it`s an act of love.” I`m still not into it, but I feel like I can understand it better and respect people who ARE into it.
Exactly. It’s like the difference between raping someone and having sex with someone interested and willing.
“I`m all for violence in it`s place. I just don`t think that place is in my romantic life”
I’m wondering where you think that place is now…
gaming!
That’s not real violence, it’s just KILLTHEBASTARD
I worked two years as a bouncer, trust me it has it`s place.
So does an apostrophe, David, and it isn’t there
I respect your opinion but I’m going to have to disagree. I’ve had a similar job myself and do not believe that violence is ever necessary. I will always advocate firmness and common sense over violence. If someone is attacking you, defend yourself – that’s not violence unless you overdo it. If someone is not playing by the rules, is threatening you or otherwise making your life hell, that’s when the police should come into it.
A lot of health professionals are not given a choice when treating women. They are required for malpractice reasons or by virtue of local ordinance to have ‘the talk’ with female patients that show signs of injury that could be related to abuse. Some cities require healthcare providers to bring in the police to document the injuries, forcing the patient to wait and them be photographed. There are cities in the United States that compel prosecution based on the appearance of physical abuse, as a submissive you’re not allowed to refuse to co-operate in prosecuting your top for domestic abuse.
So in the grand scheme of things your doctor giving you a bit of judgement out of concern seems pretty ok to me.
i can agree with you on that
Wow and I thought the gyno herself went too far. You mean they can hold people in the doctor’s office, and force them to have pictures taken?
Wow. Just another reason to wait until fully healed before seeing doctors.
Not wanting to get into the morality of BDSM, I think we need to give the OB/GYN the benefit of the doubt: she saw bruises, heard a story that may or may not have sounded believable, and assumed the worst.
How many times have we seen abuse victims deny that there was abuse when they were confronted with the evidence? It sounds like the Dr. was just trying to protect her patient.
what do morals have to do with bdsm?
The better question is: WTF is a pastor doing reading the NSFW LFMF site?
looking to spread the seed of “faith”
Or, perhaps, looking for someone he can spread his seed upon…
For those of you that can’t seem to wrap your head around this practice, you know how when you get a massage when your muscles ache, and the massage is a little bit of “ow” and a whole lot of “ahhhhh…”
It’s like that, only way better.
^this
thats why whenever you see torture and interogation scenes in movies the victim is usually smiling and saying “ahhh” after the red hot poker is jammed into their body
Haha, because torture scenes in movies which are meant to cause pain and distress, not to arouse and to pleasure, are completely like safe, sane, and consensual BDSM play.
Funnily enough, I had a therapist friend for awhile when I was in college. She said she saw patients who thought their BDSM fetish was a problem or that they were abnormal. They were shocked when they were told it’s not a mental disorder by any means unless it was acted upon by an non-consenting person or caused extreme distress or interpersonal difficulty.
My fiance and I are in a Mistress/slave relationship for a year now and I can tell you that I wouldn’t do any harm to him that would cause pain that he wouldn’t enjoy. I make sure hundreds, if not thousands of times if he is okay and if he’s actually enjoying himself. Any rational person would not go beyond the limits of their partner or the human body. If he told me he’d like it if I stabbed him, of course I would refuse.
Responding to this post, though I would understand the woman’s concern, but I would probably have left or up front said that I engaged in consensual BDSM so as to not cause accidental alarm.
Um. Aren’t you not supposed to have sex the couple of days before one’s pelvic exam? My doc always tells me to refrain from that and douching (which is a nonissue for me, but I won’t get into that here). She says it changes the pH of one’s vagina.
All it says is S&M photoshoot. OP probably just got tied up or something.
That’s true; I guess her specifying that it was an OB/GYN implied vaginal bruising rather than bruising in other places. At least it did to me.
It seems to me that the words “photo shoot” are superfluous. If it left “massive bruises,” the term “S&M” would cover it, wouldn’t it?
Also, some professions are considered “mandated reporters” of suspected abuse, who are required by their licensing boards to take action “if there is any reason to suspect abuse.” The bruises might be considered a reason; the doctor may be only discharging her professional duty, not necessarily judging the activity.
not your fail.
i am not into the whole s&m thing, but i do not begrudge those who are.
those intolerant people can go to hell.
You missed the whole point. The doctor thought she was being beaten and abused by someone. Intolerance has nothing to do with it.